A Mop Is Born


I’ve Checked The Line Above Twice And I’m Giving Up – Wait – There’s 4 Argh’s In Errrro, Right?

Y’Know, It’s Going To Be A Fab Freakin’ Tastic Thursday When …

“You Finally Prove That Ken DollBarbie’s ‘Boy Toy’ On-The-Side – Shelled Out For A Really Bad Hair Plug Job To Go With The Blank Smoothie He’s Packing Under The Belt.  Ew.  Sweet Lip Gloss, KD.  Love Nectar by MAC?”

… And, When You’re Dealing With A Mid-Week Cherry JELL-O Hangover The Way I Am.  Buckle Up, Darlings.



Oh, I’m Giving Up My Adorable Habit Of Procrastination …  

“Or, Meh-Be, I’ll Just Put It Off For A Bit To Make More Room For Deflection And Consternation, Which I’m Getting Low On.”

I Wanted To Toss My Shit During The Diva Day Care Zoom-In Yesterday – I Ditten, Dit I? – But, I Opted To Shine Through And Flipped My Love Glow Switch To A Warm And Cozy Amber Halo.

That’s My Version Of Passive Delusion, So Let’s Go With It.  Radiating.



I Mistimed My Consumption Of Fresh Fruits And Veggies After Grocery Shopping Last Saturday.  That’s As Close To A Confessional I’ll Likely Get Today.

“So, I’m Nursing The Last 4 Carrots And A Big Bulb Of Fennel Having Crunched Through A Bounty Of Italian Rapini, Cauliflower, Broccoli … Apples, Bananas, Pears.”

Failing To Convince Myself That A Stash Of Frozen Peas And Sweet Corn Niblets Count For Something More Than Colorful, Starchy Filler Orbs Added In My 39 Versions Of The Same Basic Bean & Dirty Rice Dish. 

My Cooking Style Is Best Described As Cuisine Synonym: Essentially, Everything Tastes The Same, But Looks Just A Bit Different.  I’m Saving My Culinary Inspiration For Sunday.  See Procrastination Above.  Or, Deflection.



Bromancing My Awesome Sauce Accountant …  Yeah, It Was A Fun Fling.  An Annual Taxes Thing.  When He Courts Me With Cha-Ching.

I Need To Focus On Elevating My Hair Game – Refraining From Morbid Temptation To Butcher It Until Kathy My Stylist Returns From Iso-Quarantine.

“My Mop Gets Unruly, Sprouting Lateral Weaves Of Platinum Threads Over A Naughty Mane Of Chestnut In Unholy Configurations Hinting At A Vain Cry For Sheer Intervention Or An Exorcism At Least, To Tame The Wicked Mess Into Obedience.  A Kinder Voice Would Suggest Wavy, But Not In A Jackson Maine Dreamy-Greasy-Boozy, Wasted Fuckerless Way …”

… Like How Bradley Cooper Made It So Damn Beautifully Effortless Next To Stefani Germanotta Being Ally (not Lady Gaga).  That’s The Curse Poor BraCoo Must Suffer With All His Talent And Good Looks.  I’m Happy For Him In Ways Best Not Expressed Here …



If You Say So … Oh Me, Oh My … In The Land Oz.

Should A Random Thought Of Higher Purpose Dare Enter My Head – It’s Happened – There’s A Fair Chance In Pre-Frozen Hades It’ll Fall Out Of Mouth And Drop On To A Blank Page

“Polluting The Purity Of White With A Disturbance Of Nonsense Littered With Love And Possibility … Is My Ambition In Life.”

This Is Also The Very Reason My Carpathian Mountain Dwelling Ancestors Invented Imagination.  Mom’s Side … Resourceful Salt-Of-Denial Types.  Papa Lothario’s Tribe Invented Sex …  


Image by ErikaWittlieb from Pixabay

20 thoughts on “A Mop Is Born

  1. 𝕬𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖑𝖎𝖈𝖆 𝕽𝖔𝖘𝖊

    Good morning Michael, I never thought I am going to say this but thank god I never had a Barbie doll nor a ken doll when I was a kid 😂😂😂 & When it comes to dishes tasting the same for me it was always pasta no matter what type of pasta I cook with different ingredients & different sauces, it all tasted the same, even my brother was like “Your pastas all taste the same” Once I started lowering the amount of spices especially Cumin, let’s say my pasta game got to another level 😌 so maybe it’s the amount of spices in your case too.
    I would like to thank you for liking my latest blog post “Your Turn Pearl 💌🥰”. It meant so much to me. Have a lovely day 🌸☺️

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